I Am a Whānau Member
We're Here to Help
If you are a parent, whānau (family) member, guardian, or partner, worried about someone’s sexual behaviour. You are not alone. Our team is here to help.
Stop is a community-based organisation grounded in evidence-based and culturally responsive practice, guided by the belief that everyone has the capacity to make positive change and live a fulfilling life. We offer free specialist assessment and intervention services across Te Waipounamu:
- Children (tamariki) ages 5 – 12, who display concerning sexualized behaviour.
- Adolescents/ young person (rangatahi) ages 13 – 18, who have engaged in harmful sexual behaviour.
- Adults (pakeke) 18 years who have engaged in concerning and / or harmful sexual behaviour.
Our organisation is committed to working closely with whānau, parents, caregivers, partners and professionals. Each year, we support approximately 270 whānau, with our focus on systemic interventions and the involvement of wider support networks.
Contact us for a confidential conversation. Our experienced team can guide you through the next steps, offering practical tools, and compassionate support.
You’ll find a link with clear information about each of our specialist evidence-based services, what to expect and how to make a referral.
Our Services
-
Children / Tamariki
Explore our Children ServiceOur children's service has a systemic, whānau-centered approach. Sessions involve both tamariki, parents or caregivers.
Together, we help parents or guardians to gain an understanding of the function of sexualised behaviour, equipping parents or guardians with the tools and confidence to effectively respond and support their tamariki for the future.
Support advice for parents/ guardians’ responses:
When a child (tamaiti) display concerning sexual behaviour, it can be worrying and confusing. Your tamaiti needs guidance and support to understand what okay/not okay touch is and to learn how to play safely with others. Responding to concerning behaviours in a calm and curious way will encourage your tamaiti to be open about what is going on for them and to help you understand their behaviour.
You can support your tamaiti and others stay safe by maintaining clear boundaries about privacy and personal space. While your tamaiti is still learning about safe play, it is important to closely supervise play in a supportive, non-punitive way and reassure your tamaiti that they are loved as you guide them toward safer behaviour.
You don’t have to manage this alone; professional support can help you understand what’s happening and support your whānau’s wellbeing.
-
Adolescent /Rangatahi
Explore our Adolescent ServiceIn our Adolescent Service, rangatahi work with their own individual clinician, while a designated whānau worker facilitates joint whānau sessions.
Together, we help parents, whānau and guardians understand the young person's sexual behaviour, respond safely, and strengthen whānau relationships.
It is important for families to remember that with appropriate intervention, guidance, and time, young people who have engaged in harmful sexual behaviour can develop into safe, respectful, and sexually healthy adults.
Parents and guardians often look for answers to understand why their child has behaved in this way. While there is rarely a single explanation, there are usually a range of complex factors involved and we’re here to help you and your whānau with this.
Supportive Advice for parent / guardians’ responses:
Parent/guardians may need to address safety concerns by setting clear rules and boundaries or providing additional supervision to ensure everyone is feeling physically and emotionally safe. These are safeguards and are not punishments.
Stay connected with your young person, you can be clear that the behaviour is unacceptable, but you are still here for them, and you will get through it together. Provide hope and reassurance.
-
Adult/Pakeke
Explore our Adult ServiceWithin our Adult Service, for pakeke who have engaged in concerning or harmful sexual behaviour, our focus is on accountability, safety, and working towards meaningful change.
We know that having partner and/or whānau support makes a real difference, it helps clients stay engaged in the programme, maintain safety, and work towards lasting positive outcomes. We also recognize that harmful sexual behaviour impacts partners and whānau too.
Where appropriate, and with the client’s consent, partners, whānau, and support networks are encouraged to be involved, and support is available to help you navigate this process. Our whānau and partner work has dual aims: to promote client safety, support, and accountability, and to support whānau and partners in their own wellbeing, understanding, and confidence to effectively support their loved one.
Whānau involvement may include joining a system review, attending one of the client’s sessions, or participating in a partner programme.
Whānau involvement aims to:
- Build understanding of why the harmful behaviour occurred
- Provide a safe space to process the impact for yourselves
- Work alongside their partner or whānau member to support ongoing safety
- Promote transparency and accountability
- Establish agreed safety planning
We offer both individual and combined sessions for partners and whānau members, providing space to explore the impact of the behaviour and equip them with the insight and tools to effectively support their loved one to live a good meaningful life free from sexual harm.
Our Locations
Stop is the only specialist community-based organisation that delivers assessments and intervention for concerning and harmful sexual behaviour in Te Waipounamu (South Island):
- Whakatū (Nelson)
- Wairau (Blenheim)
- Ōtautahi (Christchurch)
- Te Tihi o Maru (Timaru)
- Ōtepoti (Dunedin)
- Murihiku (Invercargill)
- Te Tai Poutini (West Coast)
Talk to us Today
If you would like to know more or talk to our friendly staff, please give us a call on 03 353 0257 or fill out our Contact Us form.
Our free service protects and respects our client’s privacy, both in terms of face-to-face contact and client records. All enquiries are confidential.